sample size dnord

perhaps you need a small, medium and large version of me.

sorry

  • [Waitress is cleaning off the table. Dan is coming back from the restroom.]
  • Waitress: Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you'd left.
  • Dan: No, it's fine, we're more or less done.
  • Waitress: I'll bring you another water.
  • Dan: I don't need another water, seriously - is that half Diet Coke molested at all?
  • Waitress: I'll bring her back another Diet Coke.
  • Dan: I don't think that's necessary - I will let you know.
  • [Waitress leaves, and comes back with another Diet Coke.]
  • Dan: Thanks, you really didn't have to.
  • [Julie comes back.]
  • Waitress: I'm sorry.
  • Julie: Okay, hey, look, another Diet Coke!
  • Dan: I got up from the table after you left.
  • Waitress: I'm sorry.
  • Julie: So wait, what?
  • Dan: I abandoned my post.
  • Waitress: I'm sorry.
  • Julie: What are you sorry for?
  • Waitress: I cleaned off the table.
  • Dan: I left after you left. I came back.
  • Julie: So you're apologizing for a clean table and a fresh drink?
  • Waitress: Yeah.
  • Julie: No, thank you! I'm from New York... I'm deeply suspicious of people doing nice things, but people here are so nice...
  • Dan: It can throw off your radar.